PathwaysWelcome to the Winter 2023 issue.

This issue features an important theme that we hope to continue discussing in Pathways. We are entering a New Birth Trend in society which recognizes and takes advantage of the reality that every birth is an activity that each mother does with her baby. While it is absolutely true that every birth is a normal, natural, and physiological process of the body, we are now learning how to bring our conscious, informed “doing” into the setting of birth, rather than relying solely on trust in the body or in experts. When our sense of conscious, internal control combines with our physiological trust or our ability to surrender to the process, then birth becomes an art and a dance. Within this framework, the father, husband, or partner can consciously learn how to participate in the birth activity with pragmatic support and a vital element for family empowerment.

Every birth is an activity of allowing the body to open and soften amid cervical contractions, to allow a baby to enter the world. In this activity, our conscious minds will be present and engaged, and there will be this moment-to-moment question: “What to do?” At each moment, there are two actions one can take:

1) Surrender, or let go, (and possibly relax and enjoy the moment.)
2) Employ conscious skills (actions intended to increase the ease of birth) that we learned beforehand or that we may discover on the go, in the moment.

Both actions can come together harmoniously and are not contradictory. If we look at any activity in human affairs, learning skills and practicing for the activity doesn’t inhibit our ability to enter into a flow state and “let go.” Often, such practice enables a flow state to occur with greater effect! If we think of cooking, driving, sex, running, or any other activity we do, practicing for the activity adds to the quality of our experience by enhancing our confidence in ourselves leading up to, and during it. This self-confidence is perhaps the key takeaway about the importance of this new birth trend. It is hard to trust the body to do an activity for us if we have never done it before. Therefore, it is normal and natural to learn skills and preparation techniques to embody and practice for this physiological activity leading up to the birth.

There is no knowing what our birth will be like. But we do know two things. We will have to surrender to the journey, and we will be conscious during the physiological activity and that conscious awareness will guide our actions. Preparing for birth, learning about the art of birth, practicing for birth, and honing pragmatic skills to do the activity with greater ease, allows us to gain a reliable self-confidence for this conscious activity. And this new trend in birth allows us to involve the father in vitally pragmatic ways, to set up an empowering beginning for the upcoming parenting journey in life.

Pathways Connect Resource Guide Topics